Njengomama, umsebenzi kababa unzima futhi ngezinye izikhathi uyacasula, ukhulisa izingane. Kodwa-ke, ngokungafani nomama, obaba ngokuvamile abatholi ukuqashelwa okwanele ngendima yabo empilweni yethu.
Bangabangani, basakaza amahlaya amabi futhi babulala izimbungulu. Obaba bayasikhuthaza lapho sisezikhundleni eziphezulu futhi basifundisa ukuthi singanqoba kanjani lapho sisezikhundleni eziphakeme kakhulu.
Ubaba wasifundisa indlela yokuphonsa i-baseball noma ukudlala ibhola. Ngesikhathi sishayela, basilethela amathayi ethu aphundlekile kanye nezimbobo esitolo ngoba sasingazi ukuthi sinethayi eliphundlekile futhi sasicabanga ukuthi kunenkinga ngesiteringi (uxolo, baba).
Ukuze kugujwe uSuku Lobaba kulo nyaka, iGreeley Tribune ihlonipha obaba abahlukahlukene emphakathini wethu ngokulandisa izindaba nokuhlangenwe nakho kobaba babo.
Sinobaba wentombazane, ubaba wezomthetho, ubaba ongayedwa, ubaba wokutholwa, ubaba wesibili, ubaba womlilo, ubaba omdala, ubaba womfana, kanye nobaba osemusha.
Nakuba wonke umuntu engubaba, wonke umuntu unendaba yakhe eyingqayizivele kanye nombono walokho abaningi babo abakubiza ngokuthi “umsebenzi omuhle kakhulu emhlabeni”.
Sithole uhlu oluningi kakhulu ngale ndaba emphakathini, futhi ngeshwa, asikwazanga ukubhala amagama abo bonke obaba. I-Tribune inethemba lokuguqula lesi sihloko sibe umcimbi waminyaka yonke ukuze sikwazi ukubika izindaba eziningi zikababa emphakathini wethu. Ngakho-ke sicela nikhumbule laba baba ngonyaka ozayo, ngoba sifuna ukukwazi ukuxoxa izindaba zabo.
Iminyaka eminingi, uMike Peters ube yintatheli yephephandaba ukuze azise imiphakathi yaseGreeley naseWeld County ngobugebengu, amaphoyisa, kanye nolunye ulwazi olubalulekile. Uyaqhubeka nokubhalela iTribune, wabelana ngemicabango yakhe ku-"Rough Trombone" njalo ngoMgqibelo, futhi ubhala imibiko yomlando yekholomu ethi "Iminyaka eyi-100 Edlule".
Nakuba ukuba nodumo emphakathini kuhle kakhulu kubanyathelisi, kungaba yinto ecasulayo ezinganeni zabo.
“Uma kungekho muntu othi, ‘O, uyingane kaMike Peters,’ awukwazi ukuya ndawo,” kusho uVanessa Peters-Leonard emomotheka. “Wonke umuntu uyamazi ubaba. Kuhle uma abantu bengamazi.”
UMick uthe: “Kufanele ngisebenze nobaba izikhathi eziningi, ngichithe isikhathi enkabeni yedolobha, bese ngibuya uma kuphephile.” “Kufanele ngihlangane neqembu labantu. Kumnandi. Ubaba usezindabeni ukuthi uhlangana nazo zonke izinhlobo zabantu. Enye yezinto.”
Idumela elihle likaMike Peters njengentatheli libe nomthelela omkhulu kuMick noVanessa ekukhuleni kwabo.
“Uma kukhona engikufundile kubaba, uthando nobuqotho,” kuchaza uVanessa. “Kusukela emsebenzini wakhe kuya emndenini wakhe nakubangane bakhe, nguye lo. Abantu bayamethemba ngenxa yobuqotho bakhe bokubhala, ubuhlobo bakhe nabantu, kanye nokubaphatha ngendlela noma ubani afuna ukuphathwa ngayo.”
UMick uthe ukubekezela nokulalela abanye yizinto ezimbili ezibaluleke kakhulu azifunda kuyise.
“Kufanele ubekezele, kufanele ulalele,” kusho uMick. “Ungomunye wabantu abanesineke kakhulu engibaziyo. Ngisafunda ukubekezela nokulalela. Kuthatha impilo yonke, kodwa usekwazi kahle.”
Enye into izingane zikaPeter eziyifundile kubaba wazo nakunina yilokho okwenza umshado nobudlelwano obuhle.
“Basenobungane obuqinile kakhulu, ubudlelwano obuqinile kakhulu. Usambhalela izincwadi zothando,” kusho uVanessa. “Kuyinto encane kakhulu, ngisho noma sengimdala, ngiyayibheka bese ngicabanga ukuthi yile ndlela umshado okufanele ube ngayo.”
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi izingane zakho zineminyaka emingaki, uzohlala ungumzali wazo, kodwa emndenini wakwaPeters, njengoba uVanessa noMick bekhula, lobu budlelwano bufana kakhulu nobungane.
Ehleli kusofa ebuka uVanessa noMick, kulula ukubona ukuziqhenya, uthando kanye nenhlonipho uMike Peters anayo ngabantwana bakhe ababili abadala kanye nabantu asebeyibo.
“Sinomndeni omuhle kakhulu nomndeni onothando,” kusho uMike Peters ngezwi lakhe elithambile. “Ngiyaziqhenya kakhulu ngabo.”
Nakuba uVanessa noMick bengabala izinto eziningi abazifundile kuyise eminyakeni edlule, kubaba omusha uTommy Dyer, izingane zakhe ezimbili zingothisha futhi ungumfundi.
UTommy Dyer ungumnikazi weBrix Brew and Tap. Etholakala ku-8th St. 813, uTommy Dyer unguyise wabesifazane ababili abahle abansundu - uLyon oneminyaka engu-3 no-1/2 ubudala noLucy onezinyanga ezingu-8 ubudala.
“Ngesikhathi sinendodana, saqala leli bhizinisi, ngakho ngatshala imali eningi ekukhuleni,” kusho uDell. “Unyaka wokuqala wawunzima kakhulu. Kwathatha isikhathi eside ukujwayela ukuba ngubaba. Angizange ngizizwe ngingubaba kwaze kwaba yilapho (uLucy) ezalwa.”
Ngemva kokuba uDale ethole indodakazi yakhe encane, imibono yakhe ngokuba ngubaba yashintsha. Uma kukhulunywa ngoLucy, ukubambana kwakhe okunzima nokujikijelana noLyon kuyinto ayicabanga kabili.
“Ngizizwa ngingumvikeli. Ngithemba ukuthi ngizoba yindoda empilweni yakhe ngaphambi kokuba ashade,” esho ngenkathi egona indodakazi yakhe encane.
Njengomzali wezingane ezimbili eziqaphelayo futhi ezigxile kukho konke, uDell wafunda ngokushesha ukubekezela nokunaka amazwi nezenzo zakhe.
“Yonke into encane iyabathinta, ngakho-ke kufanele uqiniseke ukuthi usho izinto ezifanele ezibazungezile,” kusho uDell. “Bayiziponji ezincane, ngakho amazwi akho nezenzo zakho kubalulekile.”
Into eyodwa uDyer athanda ukuyibona ngempela ukuthi ubuntu bukaLeon noLucy bukhula kanjani nokuthi buhluke kangakanani.
“ULeon uhlobo lomuntu ococekile, futhi uhlobo lomuntu ongcolile nomzimba wonke,” esho. “Kuhlekisa kakhulu.”
“Eqinisweni, usebenza kanzima,” kusho yena. “Kuba nobusuku obuningi lapho ngingekho ekhaya. Kodwa kuhle ukuba nesikhathi nabo ekuseni futhi silondoloze lokhu kulinganisela. Lokhu kuwumzamo ohlangene wendoda nomfazi, futhi angikwazi ukukwenza ngaphandle kwakhe.
Lapho ebuzwa ukuthi anganikeza abanye obaba abasha iseluleko, uDale wathi ubaba akuyona into ongayilungiselela. Kwenzeka, “uyazivumelanisa futhi uqonde”.
“Akukho ncwadi noma yini ongayifunda,” esho. “Wonke umuntu uhlukile futhi uzoba nezimo ezahlukene. Ngakho-ke iseluleko sami ukuthi uthembele emizweni yakho futhi ube nomndeni nabangane eceleni kwakho.”
Kunzima ukuba ngumzali. Omama abangabodwa banzima kakhulu. Kodwa ukuba ngumzali ongabodwa wengane yobulili obuhlukile kungaba ngomunye wemisebenzi enzima kakhulu.
Isakhamuzi saseGreeley uCory Hill nendodakazi yakhe eneminyaka engu-12 ubudala u-Ariana bakwazile ukunqoba inselele yokuba ngumzali ongayedwa, ingasaphathwa eyokuba ngubaba wentombazane ongayedwa. UHill wanikwa ilungelo lokugcina ingane ngesikhathi u-Ariane eseneminyaka ecishe ibe mithathu ubudala.
“Ngingubaba osemusha;” Ngamzala ngineminyaka engu-20 ubudala. Njengemibhangqwana eminingi esemisha, asizange sizivocavoce ngenxa yezizathu ezahlukene,” kuchaza uHill. “Unina akekho endaweni lapho angamnikeza khona ukunakekelwa akudingayo, ngakho kunengqondo kimi ukumvumela asebenze isikhathi esigcwele. Kuhlala kulesi simo.”
Imithwalo yemfanelo yokuba ngubaba wengane encane yasiza uHill ukuba akhule ngokushesha, futhi wancoma indodakazi yakhe “ngokumgcina ethembekile nokuyigcina iqaphile”.
“Ukube bengingenalo lowo mthwalo wemfanelo, bengizoqhubeka nokuphila naye,” kusho yena. “Ngicabanga ukuthi lokhu kuyinto enhle futhi kuyisibusiso kithi sobabili.”
Njengoba ekhulele nomfowabo oyedwa kuphela futhi engenadadewabo wokukhuluma ngaye, uHill kumele afunde konke ngokukhulisa indodakazi yakhe eyedwa.
“Njengoba ekhula, kuyinto yokufunda. Manje usesebusheni, futhi kunezinto eziningi zokuxhumana engingazi ukuthi ngingabhekana kanjani nazo noma ngiziphendule kanjani. Izinguquko zomzimba, kanye nezinguquko ezingokomzwelo okungekho noyedwa kithi owake wabhekana nazo,” kusho uHill emomotheka. “Lesi yisikhathi sokuqala kithi sobabili, futhi kungenza izinto zibe ngcono. Angiyena neze uchwepheshe kule ndawo—futhi angikaze ngithi nginguye.”
Uma kuvela izinkinga ezifana nokuya esikhathini, ama-bra nezinye izinkinga ezihlobene nabesifazane, uHill no-Ariana basebenzisana ukuzixazulula, bacwaninge ngemikhiqizo futhi bakhulume nabangani nomndeni besifazane.
“Unenhlanhla yokuba nothisha abahle kakhulu esikoleni samabanga aphansi, futhi yena kanye nohlobo lothisha abaxhumene kakhulu bamfaka ngaphansi kwesivikelo sabo futhi bamnikeza indima yokuba ngumama,” kusho uHill. “Ngicabanga ukuthi kuyasiza ngempela. Ucabanga ukuthi kunabesifazane abamzungezile abangathola lokho engingakwazi ukukunikeza.”
Ezinye izinselele zikaHill njengomzali ongayedwa zihlanganisa ukungakwazi ukuya ndawo ngesikhathi esisodwa, ukuba nguwe kuphela owenza izinqumo kanye nomondli wengane.
“Uphoqelekile ukuthi wenze isinqumo sakho. Awunawo umbono wesibili wokumisa noma wokusiza ekuxazululeni le nkinga,” kusho uHill. “Kuhlala kunzima, futhi kuzokwandisa izinga elithile lokucindezeleka, ngoba uma ngingakwazi ukukhulisa le ngane kahle, konke kuncike kimi.”
UHill uzonikeza abanye abazali abangabodwa iseluleko, ikakhulukazi labo baba abathola ukuthi bangabazali abangabodwa, sokuthi kufanele uthole indlela yokuxazulula inkinga futhi uyenze isinyathelo ngesinyathelo.
“Ngesikhathi ngiqala ukuthola ilungelo lokugcina u-Ariana, ngangimatasa ngomsebenzi; ngangingenamali; kwadingeka ngiboleke imali yokuqasha indlu. Sazabalaza isikhashana,” kusho uHill. “Lokhu kuyaxaka. Angikaze ngicabange ukuthi sizophumelela noma sifinyelele lapha, kodwa manje sinekhaya elihle, ibhizinisi eliqhutshwa kahle. Kuyaxaka ukuthi unamandla angakanani uma ungaqapheli. Phezulu.”
Ehleli endaweni yokudlela yomndeni i-Bricktop Grill, u-Anderson wamomotheka, yize amehlo akhe ayegcwele izinyembezi, lapho eqala ukukhuluma ngoKelsey.
“Ubaba wami ongizalayo akekho nhlobo empilweni yami. Akangibizi; akahloli, akukho lutho, ngakho angikaze ngimbheke njengobaba,” kusho u-Anderson. “Ngesikhathi ngineminyaka emithathu ubudala, ngabuza uKelsey ukuthi uzimisele yini ukuba ngubaba wami, wathi yebo. Wenza izinto eziningi. Wayehlala eceleni kwakhe, okuyinto ebaluleke kakhulu kimi.”
“Esikoleni samabanga aphakathi kanye nonyaka wami wokuqala kanye nowesibili, wakhuluma nami ngesikole kanye nokubaluleka kwesikole,” kusho yena. “Ngangicabanga ukuthi ufuna ukungikhulisa nje, kodwa ngakufunda ngemuva kokwehluleka amakilasi ambalwa.”
Ngisho noma u-Anderson athatha izifundo ku-inthanethi ngenxa yobhubhane, wakhumbula ukuthi uKelsey wamcela ukuba avuke ekuseni ukuze alungiselele isikole, njengokungathi uya ekilasini mathupha.
“Kunesimiso sesikhathi esiphelele, ukuze sikwazi ukuqeda umsebenzi wesikole futhi sihlale sikhuthazekile,” kusho u-Anderson.